


Pretend

by Shinigamibutter



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Bittersweet, Drabble, M/M, unspoken feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-16
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-06-29 10:12:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19828000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shinigamibutter/pseuds/Shinigamibutter
Summary: Kihyun never feels like he's home until he's done the return home cleaning. But he knows, and he knows that Jooheon knows that's not why he lingers.





	Pretend

**Author's Note:**

> I was/am in a bad mood. So I wrote. Like I always do. I saw someone asking for Jooki on Twitter, this isn't what they asked for but it's not like they asked me directly. 💁🏻
> 
> I typed this on my phone. If there's errors tell me.

Kihyun sighed, his hands fluttering over yet another mess made my one of the members. He wasn't sure whose mess it was. It was absent the tale tell sign that the members usually left. It wouldn't have mattered. Cleaning up, in a way made him feel more home. Maybe moreso than actually just being in the dorm did. It wasn't really home if he wasn't cleaning up after everyone. 

Which meant he also didn't feel quite like he was home until he'd cleaned the other's studios too. For those spaces were just as much an extension of home for him as they were for the member that used it. Though he knew his services weren't always needed, weren't really needed at all after returning from a tour. Still, he geared himself up with supplies and headed out anyway. 

He couldn't stop being restless until he'd done it. He knew that, the members knew that too. So Wonho said nothing more than a greeting when Kihyun entered his studio. Both of them falling into the familiar routine of working around each other. And the occasional input that Wonho asked for. Though Kihyun always found that it was after he'd left that Wonho actually wanted an opinion. But by then he was moving on.

Changkyun's studio took the second most amount of time. Not because Changkyun was particularly messy, he barely had anything in his studio to begin with, but because Kihyun dawdled. Checking how their maknae was doing, that he was eating properly, and getting enough sleep. All while making sure that it was true. Because while Hyungwon outwardly had the worst health, Changkyun inwardly did. 

Not that Kihyun minded, not that any of them minded. The life of an idol was hard and they'd known that when they signed up. But it was something that Kihyun didn't want their youngest swallowed by. With Changkyun's already introverted ways he couldn't help but worry, even needlessly as it often was. It was his nature. And honestly the fretting was easier than what always came next. 

Jooheon's studio. The last studio on his list, and simultaneously Kihyun's most and least favorite. It didn't used to be, it used to be just like Wonho's. A quick clean and out of the other's way because there were always people running in and out. That wasn't the case on cleaning days for Jooheon, not anymore. Unless it was another member of Monsta X, usually there for the cats just as much as for Jooheon.

Kihyun couldn't quite bring himself to use the excuse, at least not aloud. He knew without doing so that Jooheon wouldn't believe him. Though he did play with the cats, often stopping by to do so. And he did clean just like at the other studios. Maybe a little more in-depth because of cat hair even. But he knew, and he knew Jooheon knew that wasn't why he lingered. 

The cats weren't why he perched on the edge of the couch 'watching the monitor'. They certainly weren't why he leaned over Jooheon's shoulder every chance he got. And they weren't what made his breath catch when they caught a toy. He knew, and Jooheon knew it was him. They'd never talked about it, didn't even acknowledge the lingering. But that didn't make it unknown.

Instead Kihyun pretended to find something else to clean, his hands keeping busy while his heart fluttered over Jooheon's every word. Quiet and intimate, just between them and four walls. And when the cleaning ran out they both pretended that the new mess was an accident. Until it was late, until they'd have to either acknowledge the game they played or move on.

Kihyun moved on. He wasn't sure that's what Jooheon wanted. But the younger never stopped him. He didn't stop himself. Instead returning to the dorm that now felt like home. Back into the shelter for the feelings he couldn't voice. And he cleaned just a little bit more, just until everything was normal again. Until the next tour when he'd need to feel at home by cleaning again.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry it's short and a bit pointless. But it made me feel better.


End file.
